tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165603762522014470.post5142854467524794751..comments2023-08-17T11:04:19.748-04:00Comments on submission & metaphor: D/s and love - like a horse and carriage?oatmeal girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12842608615972752000noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165603762522014470.post-51129756374660105912011-11-05T16:22:23.739-04:002011-11-05T16:22:23.739-04:00oops, sorry, did not intent to write a novel!oops, sorry, did not intent to write a novel!mamacrowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16484565827023574347noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165603762522014470.post-5529370612027463522011-11-05T16:21:46.664-04:002011-11-05T16:21:46.664-04:00Hmmmm. A fascinating, interesting, difficult discu...Hmmmm. A fascinating, interesting, difficult discussion. Difficult for me to comment on, because for me and Papacrow, love came first, and exploration of D/s (a lot) later, although you can see threads of it, early on, here and there, because the submissive parts of me are just that - part of me.<br /><br />I do remember, OG, back when you first started seeing the sadist, you were very clear on how for you it was about it fullfilling your submissive needs; that it was a connection of convience; you were still very much activily mourning the Philospher and were adament that in no way was your heart going to get involved.<br /><br />Then you mentioned how he required a lot of prolonged eye contact during your encounters, and I thought - and I believe I commented to you - uh-oh, watch out! <br /><br />Because if you gaze into someones eyes for long enough - anyones eyes - you feel a connection and a rush of love (which is why there are such heavy social conventions as to the appropriate lengh of time for eye contact, I think).<br /><br />And goodness, the amount of stories I've come across in the D/s blogging world where the relationship started out as being 'purely ownership' and ended up as being a love match!<br /><br />I think D/s, particularly, when done well and/or for a lengh of time, requires such openess, trust and so on that love of some kind is maybe envitable? Either it develops because the situation is utterly right for it to do so, or maybe it springs up as a defense mechanism, almost to justify the amount of trust etc being given? (thinking out-loud here)<br /><br />I do think people get unecessarily hung up over labling things to be love, or not love, or what kind of love - look at the ancient greeks, they had reams of words for all the different types of love they identified. And certainly some people are very... (hmmm, whats the word I want...) CLEAR that they don't feel love, or not in the same way as others, or what they feel is in no way love.<br /><br />In the end, everything is about love. Every action, emotion, reaction, everything we do can be traced back to either love or fear.mamacrowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16484565827023574347noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165603762522014470.post-82075087239469965342011-11-05T16:13:45.677-04:002011-11-05T16:13:45.677-04:00You explained the situation very well, but am curi...You explained the situation very well, but am curious how you are dealing with it. Is it difficult for you that he is holding back his love or do you accept that is the way it is?<br /><br />FDFlorida Domhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08785387941624829985noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165603762522014470.post-27047869064289625312011-11-05T13:30:57.113-04:002011-11-05T13:30:57.113-04:00I think that love is part of being human, and that...I think that love is part of being human, and that D/s occurs between us when we are as uniquely, exquisitely human as most of us ever manage. I also think that it is hard to describe the sort of love that arises out of and alongside D/s because our culture is so attached to the fairy tale version of happily ever after treacle sweet imitation that the messy, difficult, rough and tumble of human animal emotion and attachment doesn't even have words most of the time... That is what you do such a good job of here most of the time -- words wrapped around the unnameable.<br /><br />swanSuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03961893281142538409noreply@blogger.com