Thursday, January 6, 2011

"Keep me apprised of your wherebouts."

It's good to know where your property is. And any responsible Daddy should be aware of what his little girl is up to, no matter what her age in calendar years. But sometimes the sadist is particularly insistent on knowing where I am and where I will be.

I'm never completely sure what is behind this. Sometimes he is clearly trying to plan a visit based on his own changeable schedule. When I'm going away, he wants to know when I will be on the road. He'll give me an assignment, or an image, or music to listen to, with instructions on what to listen for and permission to e-mail him as much as I'd like or even (a special treat) to text him.

But now?
Why now?

I'm sick.
I was going away but now I'm not.
And he still wants to know.
Where am I?
How is my health?

Where am I?!
Where should I be?
I'm sick.
I'm in bed.
I'm in the kitchen making tea.
I'm in the dining room, drinking tea.
I'm on the toilet, pissing away the tea.
What's to know?

Sometimes, I think, perhaps he just wants to know where I am. Sometimes, I think, perhaps he just wants to have that awareness of where I am, how I am, and what I'm doing.

Sometimes, I think, he can't stop thinking about me.
Just as I cannot stop thinking about him.


Paul said...

OG, yes, I know that feeling.
I have never owned anyone and have no desire to.
But the need to know where she is, is paramount, it ties in with concern for her well being, and much more.
Love and warm hugs,

worm said...

I had an LDR for a couple of years. Very often, when we would talk on the phone, I would ask, 'what are you wearing?' 'where are you?' 'what are you going to order at the restaurant?' I wanted to be as close to him as possible, to be part of his current experience, IN his life, ya know? And yes, it was because I couldn't stop thinking about him. I wanted to be with him. I agree, he is clearly as smitten with you as you with he. Oh yeah, as for the 'compersion' comment from the other day. This is a term that has come from the polyamory movement. It is an emotion- the emotion of joy or happiness that one feels for the joy and happiness your partner shares with another partner. That's why I referred to myself as your faithful follower; I was establishing my relationship to you! Certainly not the same thing, but I was trying to say that your delight brings me great delight!

Technowench said...

Maybe he just wants to be sure you are safe, especially when you are sick.

I think his concern rather sweet.