Monday, January 23, 2012

Mouthing off

That's what I'm not going to do.
I'm not going to start spewing frustration.
I'm not going to offer any snarky psychological analyses.

I'm just going to mentally pace, saying everything inside my head, but I'm not going to write any of it here. And you know why? Not because someone might recognize him from his behaviour patterns. And not because any of the small handful of readers who do know who he is would find out things about him that maybe they shouldn't. And not because I'm afraid he would read what I have to say. Because he told me he no longer reads here. And I believe him.

I'm not going to say all the things roiling around in my head because I love him and am committed to him and all this - the realities of our lives and our emotions and insecurities - is frankly none of your business.

But that doesn't stop the thoughts.
Or the steam coming out of my ears.

Or other stuff coming out.

I'll let you know when things get sorted out.

3 comments:

SBF said...

Big hugs to you xxxx
butterfly

Lyla said...

Big hugs, and I'm so relieved to know even you have problems too :) (but I do hope they were all worked out)

oatmeal girl said...

Problems?
Us?

Of course we have problems! We are both very intense, and the sadist has some very sensitive spots, while I am very talented at hitting them. I say the wrong thing and he (to my mind) overreacts though he wouldn't call it that at all, of course,

Right now, though, things are very good. We'll see how long that lasts...