Tuesday, June 12, 2012

I refuse to issue a DNR

His fears are the same as mine.
I knew they would be.
The foundation is shaken.
Bricks will fall off.
One problem gives rise to another.

All day, we each lived with the dread.

Tonight, he finally wrote.
He said he'd been feeling like a doctor watching a patient to die.

I can't believe it's hopeless.
We've been through so many crises.
And each time we come out stronger.
More intimate.
More open.

Even he,
this dom,
this sadist,
has opened more and more peepholes into his vulnerability.
Which only made me love him more.


I can NOT believe we're doomed.

Come on, Doctor.
Don't you have a new wonder drug?


Sue said...

The "wonder drug," as near as I can tell, is time. Love each other long enough, and things will move as they ought to -- and you will know what you cannot know today. That, my friend, is all the hard won wisdom I have to offer.

hugs, swan

mamacrow said...

oh lord. Absolutely everything crossed for you both xx