There is a significant difference between testing vibrators and testing, say, refrigerators. A fringe benefit. The process can make you feel really, really good. Oh, I'm sure there are some people who get all tingly when they check out the storage capacity of a new refrigerator, but can it really be quite the same as serious evaluations of Adult Toys?
Yesterday I posted a fairly dispassionate and generally positive review of the Siena Symphony, a vibrator sent to me by the kind people at EdenFantasys in exchange for my writing and posting an honest evaluation. Obviously, though, I didn't give you the whole story. So today will be much more subjective - and probably more arousing. At least I hope it's more arousing! I think it's utterly appropriate to be turned on by a sex toy review, don't you?
I tried out the Symphony on three separate occasions.
The first time, I used it only to stimulate my clitoris, which is normally how I masturbate. Except that normally I only use my fingers. I don't know when I switched to just my fingers. As a child I would rub myself with the palm of my right hand, or rather the flattened underside of my four fingers above my palm. Sometimes I would do what I called playing horsie, which had me lying on my belly, my pillow between my legs, riding it back and forth... oh that did feel good. But I think I must have discontinued that technique by the time I was around 8. And I remember teaching my little sister how to do it. I wonder if she remembers that?
So I don't usually masturbate with outside assistance. Though I must admit that having the Symphony will make it much more likely that I will in the future. I'm so efficient with my fingers, and usually so desperate those times when I'm allowed to masturbate, that I go charging ahead and don't take the time to linger over the pleasure.
As I mentioned yesterday, that first time I went through the ten vibration speeds and patterns in an unsystematic way. I knew, though, that I'd have to go back and sort them out. On that day, the more unusual patterns got me worked up and then I used the straight vibrations to finish myself off. I didn't insert my purple pal at all. And I didn't fantasize, which is unusual for me; I just focused on the vibrations.
My notes say that I had a great orgasm. But it wasn't hugely physical - I wasn't aware of a rush of contractions in my womb. That happens sometimes, especially this time of year, when I'm still taking a fairly huge dose of antidepressants for the SAD. I suspect that age has something to do with it as well. But there was no denying that it was an orgasm, and a badly needed one at that, what with all the stress around my father's surgery (he's doing fine now, and learning to accept the slow voyage toward full recovery). Plus I was full of other emotions, as the sadist and I moved toward and beyond a full and beautiful reconciliation. All this was released by my collaboration with my new lavender friend. I came, then rolled over onto my side and sobbed out loud "Daddy..." wondering, as the word came out, whom I was really addressing, and knowing that first and foremost I was calling to the man who owns me and shows me a happiness I never thought I'd know.
My second outing with the Symphony was a command performance. The sadist wanted to watch me use it. And so I did - a floor show following the salad during last week's long, lunchtime visit.
I forget at times that Daddy often appreciates things differently from other people. I assumed that he would be turned on by watching the vibrator moving in and out of my pussy, especially as he ordered me down on the floor with my feet pointing toward him as he sat in the Eames chair. But then he ordered me to get the pillow off the futon, and to prop myself up so he could see my face as I gave myself pleasure.
I asked if he would be willing to comment on his experience of my experience, and he kindly provided the following:
I rarely looked at the device and/or your pussy. For one thing, your hand and wrist obscured any vision of much else, and then, frankly, pussies, visually, don't really do much for me. Never have. They're just sort of there. Or, since they are an opening, not there. An absence of there, with a bit of window dressing. The rest of your body, however, was another matter. Very pleasing to observe the arching and jerking, and to watch as you drifted in and out of awareness of your surroundings, including me. And always the breathing; shallow and deep, shrill and guttural.Those were my impressions, in addition to what I said at the time about maybe suggesting a bit of pre-game practice to familiarize oneself with the different settings.
So yes, in its effect on me, my Master gives the Symphony high marks. (You can read more about that visit here.)
The third trial was conducted on Sunday, which found me in a particularly rich and loving state of mind.
There is something you must remember. When I masturbate, it is never for me. And when I masturbate to provide material for a review, that is not the only or even the greatest purpose for the activity. I touch myself for my Master, my Daddy, the sweet sadistic man who owns me and makes my life beautiful. My pleasure is all for his pleasure, and my orgasms are his as well. I touch myself only with his permission, and must report on the experience afterwards. Sometimes I will leave him my orgasm as a voice mail, so he can enjoy it again and again.
This time, last Sunday, he was home as I settled down in my lab. So I reported to him as the experiment progressed. You would think it would inhibit my responses, what with annotating the different stimulation patterns on my yellow pad of paper and then settling the computer on my lap to give him a buzz-by-buzz description of events. But instead, it brought him into the room and heightened my response.
In the interest of science, he has allowed me to share with you my real-time report:
The trials are about to commence.
Bath mat under butt to absorb slipped and leaked lube?
Device at hand?
Box top available with diagrams of the ten vibratory patterns?
Baby doesn't want to risk pussy irritation from too much friction.
Pen and lined yellow pad for taking notes?
Oh, Daddy, if only you were sitting here in a white lab coat, to observe and take notes and direct the action... I will put you there, Daddy. I will put you there beside the bed. Because everything I do is for you.
See me, Daddy.
First pattern tested, Daddy. The strongest plain vibration. I am trying to remain detached and scientific, checking and identifying each pattern, observing my responses, making notes, before settling down - and in - to what can truly be termed masturbation.
But I'm already... well, the truth is it's not just from the vibrator, Daddy. My pussy was feeling tingly but as soon as I started writing you the contractions began and now they're just getting worse. Because we know, of course, that it's not a purely physical response.
Is it, Daddy...
And now I feel you looking at me... and touching me... and how much of that was triggered by vibrating silicone and how much by your nearness as my fingers make contact with the keys...
Expansion of the image, Sir.
An additional operative is required.
Experimental subject (your pet) on the surface of your choosing, though what I saw was a plain bed with iron headboard painted white, like an old-fashioned hospital bed in those old movies. Subject naked and unrestrained, except for cold steel chain fastened snugly around her neck and attached to headboard - not so much for restraint as to remind subject that she is indeed owned property and that the proceedings are not designed for her pleasure.
You, of course, direct the proceedings. But there is a third party, Sir. Your assistant. This person stands over the subject, applying the device per your instructions, so that subject's participation can be pure and limited to reactions. Subject's head is raised - or perhaps the whole head end of the bed is raised, to facilitate observation, and assistant is often scolded for inadvertently blocking your view.
The poor assistant becomes quite aroused, Sir, but you deny any relief unless at some point it would serve your pleasure.
You might perhaps enjoy making a film of the experiment, to capture the sights and sounds... the sounds, Sir... I do think you would enjoy the sounds...
I'm sure I would enjoy that, my pet.
mmm... momentarily... computer on lap... vibrator between legs, positioned along length of slit but not inserted, operating in strong bursts... there as an element of torture to this, Daddy... I almost left all my typos to show what it is doing to me... one more pattern to try and then I will proceed to insertion...
I wish you could see my face, Daddy... and hear my whimpers... one of the main things I'm learning from this is not to push but to give myself to the sensations... let them work their way in and do their thing... they end up having much more power than I would expect from first pulse...
Beautiful and painful... which tends to translate to fantasies of pain...
My cock wants you.
mmm... I'm glad your cock wants me, Daddy.
I'm fighting my way out of my post-orgasmic stupor... had a lovely nap... a lovely orgasm... for you, Daddy... as I rose towards it, I was wishing I could have given it to you in a voice mail...except that changes it, Daddy. I become aware... and concerned about timing... when to call... worried I won't in fact cum once I do call.. or that I will cum too soon or too late...
Anyway, Daddy, it was for you whether you saw and heard it or not. As I grew very close... and it was a lovely, gradual, unforced build-up... oh, and speaking of your cock, Daddy love, I realized this vibrator is a lovely device for Kegel exercises... anyway.... mmm... I could have slept all afternoon and slept much longer than I meant to... oh where was I?... so floaty, Daddy... as I was getting close I said (to myself? aloud? I'm honestly not sure) Hurt me, Daddy.... and then I rose even closer and I said Don't hurt me, Daddy! Please, don't hurt me... and then I came.
mmm... feeling so relaxed... and a little squirmy and flirty and young and you're my Daddy and my life and I love you... and I should take a shower now...
I love you.
And I feel your fingers closing, clamping onto my nipples...
I'd say the Symphony did a very good job.
And now, on to the next.
I'll be getting another toy soon for this month's review.
(This review is really last month's review but I got an extension due to family illness.)
The next toy will be another of their G-spot Vibrators, so I can do a comparison test while learning more about that elusive part of my interior.
Again, thanks to EdenFantasys for inviting me into their program, and to the sadist for allowing me to participate. It really has been a lot of fun, both the testing and the writing. And most important of all, it has given pleasure to the sadist, who gives so much pleasure to me.