Friday, April 3, 2009

He was here

This morning.
He showed up in my stats.
What was he doing up so early in the morning, anyway?!

It doesn't matter.
It's irrelevant.

If you had read the lunacy in my last post, would you want to have anything to do with me?

It's my broken heart.
I'll learn to deal with it.

And now scientists are saying that
the heart muscles do regenerate after all.
Very very slowly,
especially at my age.
But still.
A hope for a cure.


baby girl said...

don't be so hard on yourself. heartache makes you crazy. i keep struggling with the temptation to send my ex messages...and failing. every now and then. more often than i'd like to admit. one slips away from me. i immediately regret it. feel weak and stupid. but it doesn't keep me from succumbing to the next temptation. heartache makes you crazy.

mamacrow said...

what lunacy in your last post? You didn't do anything wrong. you can hardly call the craiglist message you did as invasive in anyway.

I'm not saying you're all right and he's all wrong, but you seem to often be coming across sort of saying that you're all wrong and he's all right, and that's not correct either...

in there end there is no 'right' and 'wrong'... it just happened how it happened ((((HUGS)))

Louise said...

sweet hugs to you, deary... take good care of yourself, xxx.

oatmeal girl said...

ah baby girl, it's nice to know i'm not the only one.

mamacrow - no, you're right, the craigslist post wasn't all that terrible. but i was rather in a state all week, and that's part of what is too hard for him to take. my mood swings. they're not all that bad any more, but with the dark and who knows what else, this week was a bad one, and reading that post would have reminded him that he is well rid of me. a grad student needs calm, not tumult. (hmm... why does "tumult" sound like a Yiddish word?)

thanks, Louise. you, too.