Wednesday, June 10, 2009

He was there for me

I was upset.
The shooting.
It hit me hard.

I'm not sure why this one so much.
Anti-Semitism is nothing new.
Hatred is nothing new.
Guns, violence, crazies...
Maybe because it was 12 miles from home.
Maybe because I've been there.
Maybe because with Obama
this was supposed to be a new world.
And there are those out there
doing their best
doing their worst
to cover us with evil
and drown us in darkness.

When he accepted me into his service, he was very clear as to what he would not be for me. It was all very strict and specific, and there were many good reasons for that. "I am not your boyfriend, I am not your tennis partner..." etc. etc. Those are the ones I remember off-hand.

Still, as I became more and more distressed, I felt this irresistible urge to curl up next to him, curl up into him, feel his arms around me making me feel safe. Not possible. And not to be expected. Or anything like it.

But I wrote him an emotional e-mail.
And signed on to yahoo chat.
And waited.

He came.
He was there for me.
He came as a man.
No more and no less.
No dominance.
No posturing.
Whatever he may claim,
he was there as a friend.
And as a man.
He was what I needed.
And I would do anything for him.

True ownership isn't taken.
True ownership is earned.

And tonight, he owns me more than ever.


Paul said...

OG, evil lives on unfortunately, whether it be Jews, Coloured, Foreigners, Gays or whatever, someone will see them as less then human and worthy of death.
Not considering the mentally unbalanced or psychotic.
It is my faith that light will conquer darkness and in this instance your Master is an envoy of light.
As all Masters and Doms ought to be, but unfortunatelly aren't always.
Love and warm hugs,

Doll said...

That news story breaks my heart, just ridiculous how insane some people are. I send my compassion and love your way.

mamacrow said...

(((hugs))) OG, and I'm glad (that he was there for you) *soppy smile*!