There are some bad people out there.
Well, yes, I know, that's nothing new. But I've been hearing about some particularly bad people taking advantage of submissive women. And we are very susceptible to being taken advantage of. BDSM by its nature requires an enormous amount of trust. It means baring our vulnerability the way we bare out breasts.
We want so much.
We need so much.
We give so much.
We are so easy to hurt.
I have friends in this world of blogs who have been badly hurt.
Taken advantage of.
My anger is a cold rage. I have visions of a band of vengeful submissives roaming the country, giving these men the punishment they deserve.
Use your imaginations.
Of course, I can't help stepping back and trying to take a detached look at my own vulnerability, my own decisions, my own potential for being physically and emotionally hurt.
There are, in fact, never any pure guarantees in relationships - whether strictly traditional or wildly radical or anything in between. Things can be turned upside down from one minute to the next - whether from illness or accident or a new person or an unexpected change of heart. No matter how committed people are, there are no guarantees.
All we can ask is honesty.
All we have to give is our trust
and in exchange we hope for honesty.
Some of you worry about me. I know that. Hell, if the woman I was a year and a half ago was reading this blog now, she would be worried about me. Because yes, my limits are falling. My limits aren't even being discussed. I am moving into areas I have never been, areas I didn't think I'd want to go in reality no matter what my fantasies, and all I say is -
Yes, my Lord.
Thank you, my Lord.
Whatever will please you, my Lord.
So yes. I don't argue with those of you who are worried. I don't argue with those of you who think I'm being reckless and stupid. In fact, it's a good idea to have a Greek chorus in the background reminding me that things aren't always what they seem and that submissive pets are quite often prone to lose their perspective.
We so want to believe their promises.
But to those who worry, let me tell you this.
He makes no grand promises.
He doesn't offer more than he has to give.
And he doesn't claim to love me.
Our relationship is clear.
I have no illusions.
He gives me no reason to have any.
I delight in what he gives me, I rejoice in what he's made me, I dance at how he's freed me to be who I really am. And if I see him for half an hour once a week, I count myself as very lucky.
I expect nothing.
And I go to bed happy.